We chew and spit you out

After he won I was in shock for I-don’t-know how long. Weeks. Months. The world felt bizarre, surreal. I remember looking at people who looked like Republicans. I remember eating lunch in restaurants with people who looked like business people eating lunch. I’d come to know they were not to be trusted, but I didn’t…

Good fake news today

Woke up this morning with a light heart, not heavy, not suffocating. The air didn’t weigh on me like it used to and will again, it was clean. The sky was more blue than last month, and the bankers fangs were muzzled. I was not sure, not entirely, whether they would act in my best…

In these dark times, Bad Lip Reading shines a funny

Palpatine is moving aggressively to seal off borders, stifle government communication, bring back torture, and beta-test martial law in Chicago, so I’m glad I found something to laugh about today. I needed this. Here it is: Bad Lip Reading has been around for a long time, apparently. Several years at least, been featured on Ellen…

Good morning, Palpatine

…and goodnight, America, you’ve been great. I wish I’d appreciated you while we were together. I tend to be negative and find faults in you. I tend to be an iconoclast, but today I realize we had it pretty good together, you and I. I’m sorry you had to die. No, I will not give…

On the Impending Trumpocalypse

It’s not over but it looks over. The numbers must be wrong. I can’t keep my eyes open, I’m falling asleep in my chair. I have to be up at five for work. I still have hope. Or I’m still in denial. I don’t know. I close the browser on my desktop, call it up…

Hercules Gets a Job

I was sitting at a table under a tent, on a street called Piotrkowska, in a city called Łódź, in a place called Poland, drinking a beer called Żywiec. It was spring. There was still a bit of a nip in the air, but the ladies couldn’t wait any longer to remove their fur coats…